my brother's gone. You think to yourself that there's a reason for everything. That he was in so much pain, and then you think and you regret and then you get angry, why is he gone.....

Then you try to take a big step back, and you realise to yourself, that you're just being selfish. The only reasons you want someone to stay is cause of how YOU feel. I couldn't imagine how much pain and suffering he went through.... and for him its finally over, the physical pain at least. I couldn't bare to see him everyday, he was the scary big brother. and suddenly he was skin and bones and he was just not him. But my brother's sense of humor rang through. to the very last few days he could talk.

Now both my father and big brother are gone. both from the same things......

They both had diabetes.... My brother from when he was a child. My father from when he was a young adult. You young people out there dont realise the importance of a healthy living. Even I LOVE LOVE LOVE my sweet food.

But you have to realise that once you get diabetes you can never be cured. you can get it UNDERCONTROL. but you still have it. Yeah Yeah Halle Berry has it, but she has money for chefs and nutritionists and expensive medical care at all times.

You think that, 'No Lah it will never happen to me.' But once you get diabetes, no matter how hard you try, your body eventually gives up without the proper care, this happens with old age too. But alot faster when you have diabetes. Imagine getting a cut, you leave it for a few hours its dry a few days later, its healed.

when you have diabetes, you have a cut, if you're not careful it gets infected, if you're seriously unlucky it spreads, if you leave it longer it turns to gangrene.A simple healing process disappearing from your body.

But diabetes is not the only thing you have to watch out for. you've got hereditary high blood pressure, anemia, heart disease. Find out what your family has and you might have it too. its a little thing called a gene pool, and disease seem to enjoy following heirs. Ive grown up with a nurse for a mother, so with her children's medical history in mind, we were routinely put through diets and blood tests... we even had a ration of ice cream. It didnt help that all my mother's children's genetic makeup made it easy for us to put on weight. For all youz out there with naturally high metabolic rates, Im jealous.........

I have had knowledge of the fact that I have a form of thalassemia since I was a child. Minor though but if I marry another carrier my children have a great possibility of getting thalassemia, a form of anemia, meaning my kids might need blood transfusions. Scary, but at least I know. So yeah maybe doctors and hospitals suck, but they might know something.

My family has a history of lumps in their breasticles, meaning its another thing I need to watch out for. But our health has never actually been such a big deal right. Cause if someone goes its cause it was an accident or 'got somebody make' (ada orang do black magic). hahahaha

But Ive grown up hearing, lai you should lose some weight, NDA LAWA....... So I grew up with some horrific self esteem issues. hahaha. didnt help that I was darker and alot taller then everybody else..... KIDS ARE CRUEL......

Now I'm gonna say.... You should seriously try to get more healthier cause you'll feel better. Cause so what if you're fat, ugly, dark, skinny, fair, short tall or smelly..... ok smelly, get some deodorant. But we should focus on promoting a healthier lifestyle, exercising having less sweet food less salt less oil. But once in awhile is fine what.